Testing

I have been working hard these last two weeks, while Eric has been away, to change my thinking about my position as it relates to him and God. I am beginning to see what is expected of me a little more clearly. What seemed like Eric's demands now, I now can view from a different angle, which is that by submitting to Eric I have submitted to the Lord and this is the greatest honor. However, it is very easy to think about change, slightly difficult to change your mind or attitude, but it is much more difficult to change your actions. One of the easiest subjects in my current "wife curriculum" is Home Care 101-teaching a stubborn young woman how to care and clean her own house. This is such as easy subject to test because the results are apparent for all to see. I admit, I have been lax in this area. Cleaning has always been difficult for me and I have never really gained an appreciation of a clean house or a repulsion for a dirty house. These things are coming, but again, I don't have them yet.

My time of testing came, yesterday evening, when Eric said that he was part of a group that was required to come back "to the rear" which is in Centralia. I was happy that he had gotten out of his CQ duty and we hung up. Several minutes later Eric called back to tell me that they were not going to Centralia, but to the armory in Olympia! He wanted to know if I would pick him up and bring him home for the night. It's a no-brainer when your spouse call up and says that he will be 10 miles away for the night, you haven't seen him in two weeks and you are still going to be apart for another 2 weeks. Of course I would pick him up! Then came the problem- Eric wasn't due home for 2 weeks, and the house was appropriately dirty! I had two hours to make the house presentable. Not going to happen.

I spent the largest amount of time clearing a spot for him on the bed, moving all the laundry to the living room to fold and changing the sheets. I had also hoped to do the dishes because that always makes my tiny kitchen look clean. I had just finished folding the last shirt when Eric called to say that he was ready for me to pick him up. I sighed, berated myself and got my children together to drive into Olympia. We picked him up, he came home, said nothing about the house, slept and went back this morning. It was an enjoyable few hours though I am extremely grateful that most of the hours were spent asleep because he was given less time to evaluate the house. I think I learned a valuable lesson though: you never know when someone is going to come over and you might as well be prepared.

When I was using Flylady's system (www.flylady.com), one of the first acronyms I noticed (she uses almost as many as the Army) was CHAOS- Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome. This "syndrome" was indeed what I was/am suffering from. The fact that I don't want to clean and don't get dressed first thing in the morning is what prevents me from NOT being trapped by my house. Learning to clean frequently as a part of my daily activities is essential. This is what I am learning; I have two more weeks to establish it.

I was tested last night and though I could have failed miserably, I did pass...with a C-/D+. I should be capable of getting an A on that particular test, everytime, so that is my goal for the next two weeks...